“What the hell happened?”
“What is wrong with you?”
“Are you serious?”
“Stop kidding now!”
Well, these are the exact words in which people expressed their reaction to the news-“I am getting married”
Some of them were close friends, a few not so great friends but by and large people I wanted to share the news with. While I wasn’t very surprised how they found it too hard to believe I was amazed by how each and every person who got to know about the news reacted in the same manner. I give myself a pat on my back. Wow, I startled everyone including me. I had very strong opinion about arranged marriages or love marriages rather marriages all together! I was often vocal about these opinions too and here I am declaring that I am getting engaged to a guy I have known for barely a month and that I had made the decision to get married to him over just two days. Shocking! I know.
Now that I have experienced something amazing I want to put it out there- this decision of mine which seems too sudden and out of the blue for many. I don’t want to sound too cliché and tell you all what is not true- I will not tell you it was love at first sight and all the crap. Here is the how it happened-
It took incredible amount of coaxing and cajoling from my mom who turned the world around to make me understand there was nothing wrong in meeting a guy – it is not like you will get married the next moment. Take your time, decide for or against it. But give it a try. I pushed myself reluctantly and literally ate the head of every friend around me trying to gather as much as understanding of the situation I was suddenly in. An open mind was needed. I decided to be bluntly frank, no different than who I am and seriously give it a chance and consider the guy.
As judgmental, fussy and choosy as I seem- I was always looking for those minor appreciable qualities- A mind that looks at life like I do and is able to converse and hold my attention, startle me with every word that’s spoken. I found it and I was amazed. In a matter of first few hours I found myself trying to calm down, think rationally and not get too excited about what I can possibly discover about this man. Intuition was another thing. You must be familiar with the over used and abused statement, “You will know when the right one comes along.” I can vouch for it now- That stupid cliché fancy line is true!! I would have laughed had I heard from someone else but that is bloody well true! However, I should tell you that since life is no fairytale, I brushed the intuition aside and used every iota of my brain in understanding the implications of getting involved with him, making him a part of my already awesome life.
I am amazed at how someone I never knew existed shared the same thoughts and similar understanding of life, had the exact opinions and expectations from a marriage. I kept wondering as he spoke- is this really happening? Everything I discovered about him made me like him a little more. The surprise was written all over my face- I was left speechless and breathless. We both were very aware of the vibe, of the rapport we had discovered. Very aware that we had little time, we shared the most unpleasant things about ourselves rather than the good aspects and saw how the other person took it. When all the skeletons were out of the cupboard it didn’t seem too scary and we figured we can live with each other and perhaps live very well.
Few people who got to know the news couldn’t help conceal their fears and concerns which I understand because I answered all of these by myself before I said yes-
1. Are you ready for this?- There is never a defined time when you can say I am ready for a marriage. Many people also ask- do you have the maturity to handle it. How the heck do I know.. It is not like a trial and error thing. Honestly, because I have found a guy who I believe is the best companion I could have found I will be present and live every minute of the relationship and willingly part my life with him. That is all I know and rest is that beautiful word called – FAITH
2. Why so early?- I want to question back in answer- Do you ever postpone joy?
3. What about your career? Of course no compromises on that. I wouldn’t have liked him if he didn’t understand that.
4. You barely know him. How can you know?- You can’t complete the understanding cycle in a matter of months or years- it takes a lifetime. Whatever little I know about him gives me that faith and belief that I want to take that risk of become his companion. And, I want that lifetime to discover little things about him and be amazed each day.
5. Can you deal with the change?- I’ve found a guy who likes who I am and who wouldn’t want to change the way I live my life. There are many new things that come with a marriage, I agree. But it will continue to be just me in a different situation of life.
6. Why arranged?- Because it found me the guy I felt like marrying.
P.S: Engagement 29th Feb 2012 and Wedding 28th July 2012
And, there goes my story. :')